I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Randomize
