You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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