Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
