Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Randomize
