My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
