There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Randomize
