ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I deserve this hangover.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
