My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
This house was built for laser tag.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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