1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
