The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize