He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
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