Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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