I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
