It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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