just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
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