garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
