I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Randomize