writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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