i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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