yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
