You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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