three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
