3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
literally had 100 drinks last night.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Randomize
