He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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