it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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