I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
