you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
