P.S. I can't hear my feet
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
i out mim tonsoeep
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