I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
