Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
