so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
how does that bad decision feel?
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
