I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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