After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize