So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
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