i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
