does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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