remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
ok first of all what the fuck
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
