I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
