She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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