No, you can still breathe under the balls.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
So vagazzling was a success
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize