All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
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