Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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