garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
