i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
