I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
