I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
