I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
My vagina is officially offended.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
