And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
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