i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
Randomize
