Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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